Background

Our starting point is Stockport, Cheshire (as it was then), in the 1960’s and there are a few things you need to know. Firstly, we (my older sister Gill or Gillian as she was then) were brought up within half a mile of where my mother had been raised and in turn her family had lived for more generations than anyone could remember. In fact I’ve found out recently that the family (Hammonds) have been traced back to at least the 1700’s there. Secondly, while my mother only had two brothers, her father was one of nine, which is rather a lot of Hammonds, especially when they start breeding and clearly if my (maternal) Great Grandparents were anything to go by they would have a particular gift for it. Thirdly, my maternal Grandmother (for obvious reasons not an actual Hammond) was both a dominant matriarch of the old school and had a special talent for instigating arguments, rifts and the odd blood feud. Her husband died the year I was born and my memory is of dear old Gran holding court in her house every weekend when her children and occasionally Grandchildren were called to attendance. People who were normally of mild, even tepid, temperament would leave the throne room in a state of seething bad temper, uttering oaths the like of which I’ve never heard before or since. Quite what went on in there I’ll never know and it’s probably best not to and yes she is just about to go and handbag someone.

My Grandmother had just one sister who was certainly her equal in terms of force of will and in the late 1960’s when, in turn, her husband died she returned from London and the two sisters lived in the one house in Stockport. There they indulged in the rather jolly sport of dangle the will. I’m not sure if people still do this but the rules are relatively simple, it’s a bit like poker. Bluff people into not only thinking you have an estate worth bothering about, but that you are likely to snuff it any second and then con them into undertaking all sorts of tasks, missions, plots etc on your behalf. They thus spent the next two decades terrorising innocent and not so innocent relatives. Of course they look quite sweet in this photo but then they must have been about 9 at the time and it looks like a scene from Gilbert and Sullivan!

Their other main pre-occupation was a competitive desire not to die first, as the one left standing (well lying flat on your back would do as long as you were still actually breathing) would inherit the house. I’m pleased to report that my Gran, tough old soldier that she was won this battle too.

Of course this type of behaviour is not that far up the evolutionary tree from cannibalism, of which it is really just an emotional form, it also has some unfortunate side effects like major family rifts. In fact dear old Gran had been at the centre of one some time in the 20’s or 30’s. There are conflicting stories of what she did exactly, but suffice it to say I had no idea that I was part of a much wider extended family than I ever imagined. The only clue was when I used to walk around Stockport with my mother and we were stopped every two minutes by someone saying: "…aren’t you Bill Hammonds daughter?". Now this was generally aimed at my mother and was exceptionally boring to a five year old, it felt as if she was related to half of Stockport, of course years later I found out that in fact she probably was. As I say this is largely through the Herculean efforts of Elizabeth and Edward Hammond (my Great Grandparents) pictured on the left with my Grandfather. If she looks a bit thin and exhausted I would say she probably was.

I write all this as a man but of course I experienced it as a child, it thus seemed to me that the world consisted only of people who lived in Stockport and always had. This in turn was my immediate family, a Grandmother, her sister and two Uncles who had produced 4 cousins. In fact we largely saw only the one Uncle plus his immediate family and my Gran, my mother (always quite fiery) also had a penchant for falling out with people or simply not really approving of them. However, we were on the brink of discovering a new world.